Why Can’t I See the Bride Before the Wedding? What This Old Superstition Looks Like In Today’s Utah Weddings

Have you ever wondered exactly why everyone says you can’t see the bride before the wedding? There are all kinds of wedding superstitions with origins tracing back to cultural, traditional, or just plain made-up practices. We’re here to tell you where this specific practice started, and what it looks like in today’s Utah weddings.

No Escape

Not being allowed to see the bride before the wedding gets its origins from when arranged marriages were common practice. Nowadays, obviously grooms will be seeing their bride-to-be throughout the entire wedding planning process and even leading up to the big day. But in the not-too-distant history, couples who were arranged to be married by their families weren’t allowed to see each other at all until the moment the bride made her way down the aisle. It was a real married-at-first-sight kind of thing.

The reason for this was so that one person or the other couldn’t get a look at who they were set to marry and decide to back out. It’s also why it’s tradition for a bride to wear a veil over her face—staying covered until the very last moment so it’s too late for the groom to decide he’s not that interested.

The history behind it definitely takes the romance and love out of weddings, but luckily, the tradition is carried through to today without the original meaning.

The Groom Needs His Tissues

Some brides and couples will stick to this superstition by not allowing the groom or future spouse to see the bride at all on the wedding day—until the moment she walks down the aisle. All because brides want that special moment of seeing their soon-to-be-spouse’s reaction to her in all her bridal beauty.

You’ve seen all the cute videos online—we especially love all the Utah weddings that show a cute teary-eyed spouse-to-be at the end of the aisle!

Let’s be real, that’s one of everyone’s favorite parts of the wedding. Photographers and guests alike love to see the groom’s reaction the moment he sees his bride slowly stepping towards him.

If this is the new reason behind an old superstition these days, we’re not mad about it!

As Jane says in 27 Dresses*, “You know how the bride makes her entrance and everybody turns to look at her? That’s when I look at the groom. His face says it all.”

The Grand Wedding Gown Reveal

Another big reason that brides want to stay hidden on their wedding day—not just from the groom but from everyone—is so she can show off her wedding dress in a grand reveal. After all, the wedding gown is the main character in a wedding after the bride.

We all know you have a hidden folder of photos that has all your wedding dress fittings and gown details locked away from your fiance.

And as more and more brides are sharing their wedding journey with their social media followers, we’re loving the trend of showing off every dress you tried on except the one you actually chose, leaving that dress a secret until the wedding. If you make one of these videos, we’re begging you to tag us in it so we can see!

This idea keeps the fun tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding—or rather not seeing the bride in her dress before the wedding—and makes it all the more exciting.

Brunch and Bridals for Utah Weddings

But some couples these days are deciding not to keep this tradition going at all for their weddings. From brunch before they get ready to first look photos—or bridals days or weeks in advance that tend to be unique to Utah weddings—brides and grooms and couples from all over are choosing to have their own version of this old wedding practice.

Rather than stress about not seeing their future spouse at all before they say their I dos, couples would rather spend as much time as possible with each other on their wedding day—and we don’t blame them. After all, that’s the reason for the wedding in the first place!

We’ve heard of planned brunches with the whole wedding party on the morning of the big day, yoga sessions out on the lawn at your venue, or even couples who choose to go for a cute coffee date just the two of them before it’s time to meet the hair and makeup team. After all, why not spend an easy morning together basking in the fact that it’s your actual wedding day?

If you’re looking for a stress-free wedding day, something like this might be perfect for you.

This keeps the mystery and excitement of the big wedding dress reveal while allowing you to enjoy the day with the one you love most!

Utah Weddings With First Look Moments

Or, if you’re one of our Utah brides, you might even opt to have your bridal photos taken way before your actual wedding day, whether for religious reasons or just because that’s when your dream location in the mountains is perfectly green. Your big wedding dress reveal will happen in advance—hence the fun newer tradition of having a first look.

A lot of Utah wedding photographers and videographers include a first look and bridals in their wedding packages. Often they’re even on the same day. We absolutely love a wedding dress reveal with just you and your spouse-to-be in the beautiful poppy fields, or at the dramatic red rocks in Southern Utah (or literally any of Utah’s other amazing locations). You get that wow moment and a cute reaction in a more intimate and private setting. And then you have bridal photos ready to use as decor on your wedding day!

Or, if you want a little bit of both, we’ve seen couples who do a first look on their wedding day—but before the ceremony. You have that moment together to see each other in your wedding attire, and revel in the fact that you’re about to be married, all while enjoying private time to be excited and maybe cry a little. We know we would.

Having a first look right before your ceremony can also help calm those wedding day nerves, just like this Utah bride’s experience!

It’s Your Wedding Day, Make it Exactly How You Want

But no matter where you are on the don’t-see-the-bride-before-the-wedding-day-to-first-look spectrum, it all comes down to what you prefer and what would make you the most comfortable on your wedding day. If you want that grand reveal moment at the end of the aisle like in 27 Dresses, or you’d rather have your first look way in advance, at the end of the day it’s your wedding, and you’re in charge.

It doesn’t matter if a wedding superstition or tradition says you have to do things a certain way. It’s ultimately a celebration of your love story and the love you share with your fiance, so whatever that celebration looks like, it will be incredible. Just don’t forget to send us your photo galleries so we can swoon over the whole day with you!

If you want more advice on how to approach planning your wedding day perfectly, organizing timelines to include time for bridals and first look photos, and everything else that comes with wedding planning, we have absolutely everything you need in our wedding planning course. It’s designed specifically for Utah weddings (though it’s very helpful for any couple no matter where you are), and can help ease the stress of wedding planning immensely.

Oh, and of course we have all the inspo you’ll ever need. Whether you need the perfect wedding photographer for your first look, a dream wedding dress for that “wow” moment, or style guides and color references from real weddings, Utah Valley Bride has everything.

Feel free to click around and stay a while! We’re so glad you’re here.

Love, the UVB Team. XOXO